Hotels with kids: the questions to ask before you book, not after

"Family friendly" might be the most elastic label in the whole hotel industry: it's used by the resort with an eight person kids' club and by the property that owns, in total, one highchair and nothing else. For a family choosing where to spend a holiday, the gap between those two meanings is the holiday itself. Here's how to find out beforehand, not at check in, which one you've landed in.

The most revealing question isn't about amenities, it's about space: how will the four of us actually sleep? If the answer is a foldout bed inside a regular double room, "family friendly" is mostly a front. Places that genuinely think it through have connecting rooms guaranteed at booking, not on request, or family suites with a separate kids' area. "On request" always deserves a written confirmation email: on request means someone else might already have claimed them.

The questions almost nobody asks

Second question: what age does the kids' club actually accept, and what's the staff to child ratio? Many clubs start at four years old, and families arriving with a three year old often find out on site that the heavily advertised service doesn't apply to them at all. For younger kids, ask about babysitting, rates and how much notice is needed. Third question: does the restaurant run on kid friendly hours, or does dinner only start at eight pm? The more attentive properties offer early dinners for little ones, or a casual service always available. Fourth: does the pool genuinely have a shallow end, and does the beach slope gently or drop off suddenly? Photos are especially misleading here, and other families' reviews tell the truth better than official images ever do.

There's also the chapter of hidden child related costs: the crib supplement some places charge, the age up to which kids eat and sleep free, the cost of a third or fourth bed in the room. Between "free under twelve" and a seventy percent surcharge on the adult rate, a week's difference can run into the thousands of euros. It's a line item worth comparing with the same care you'd give the room price itself.

There's finally one indicator that, in my experience, almost never lies: how the hotel responds to an email full of questions about children. Anyone who answers in detail, names the services precisely and maybe even flags things you hadn't thought to ask, has a genuine culture of family hospitality. Anyone who replies with two lines of generic politeness is gently telling you they tolerate kids and that's about it. When in doubt, the quality of a pre booking reply is always a dress rehearsal for what the actual stay will be like.